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by sex I mean being tied up and electrocuted or having my hair pulled or something I dunno.

I know people want to touch me because they keep doing it without asking but for some reason no one wants to just ask.

>>60
>>62

Challenge: Openly communicate your feelings and desires (say stuff like "you're so cute" and "can I kiss you" and "can you pull my hair" and "can you do it more like this instead")

Difficulty: Impossible

Also focusing more in on the "keep doing it without asking" part… If people are touching you when (and in ways) you DON'T want them too then it's extra crucial that you speak up.

I get the impulse to just go along with things to be polite and to avoid confrontation, but don't do that. It's okay to say no.

>>64
this. easier said than done but yea being an useless lesbian is only fun and sexy in anime and memes
even if you're submissive you still need to take steps towards leading the situation towards what you want. i guess my way of flirting is just being really open about my interests (also lol @ accidentally getting into threesomes)

I don't really understand what you're asking. What two steps? One of them is "having sex", the other is "someone says they want to have sex"? What do you mean they don't mean it?

>>72
people being like very overtly toppy and then like not wanting to actually do stuff with me, like being toppy is just like a fun way to talk to people?

>>66
yeee, also yeah I think it probably helps a lot that in america my girlfriend is there too, plus there's like the limited time frame and everything.

>>65
Yeah I do speak up, the problem is its always new people, so it's like a never-ending issue. I definitely get the wanting to be polite thing though, and find it tricky in group social situations to speak up, but at least I can usually speak up afterwards when I've processed it.

>>64
I do have experience with this, I'm getting better at it, I'm very good at it with my girlfriend but still like learning to do it with other people I'm less confident with a bit.


Thank you all, actually this has been really helpful, I think I'm on the right track for things I just have to pace myself and take it one step at a time, pushing myself a bit when I need to. Mostly I just had poster's madness and felt the need to post.

>>74
>people being like very overtly toppy and then like not wanting to actually do stuff with me, like being toppy is just like a fun way to talk to people?

they're flirting with you, but people generally don't go from flirting to fucking without some steps in between. you have to flirt back so they know that their flirting is effective.

now, as you said, you don't know how to flirt. so what you have to do is take their behavior, and say it back to them in a way that works for you. if they talk about what a nice breedable ass you have, you say something like "I need to get my ass bred soooo bad"

if someone you want to have sex with is flirting with you, congrats, you have already got past the hardest part. now you just need to mirror them.

>>145
oh yeah this is good advice. it seems obvious but I never really thought about this, and this seems super do-able.

I guess part of it is also getting over my own insecurities, especially when it comes to kink stuff, since this is the first time I've had a lot of kinky people around me consistently. This would also explain why I can let my guard down a bit and relax and get with people easier abroad, because I don't worry as much.

I do think a lot of people I come across though are kinda awkward with it and may be like stepping over some lines a little bit, but only because they're also autistic and awkward like me too. I'm still dealing with some trauma stuff too, and I find people get a bit too eager with some darker stuff they should probably check first with, which causes me to recoil.

Still though, I feel like I'm in a better place in general right now, and this advice gives me confidence with the next time I put myself out there a bit, I'll probably be able to know roughly what to do. Thank you!

>>146
oh yeah I guess I should mention that I used to not be hot and now apparently i'm really hot, which I know pretty objectively even if my internal body image wanes.

It's a very weird thing to be thrown in. Like I didn't believe it for a while because it felt like a wish fulfilment feminization fiction, where my dick shrank, I got huge hips and E cup tits, my feet shrank (the only shoes I had that fit me for like 3 months were 3" stiletto heels), I shrank to 5'4", super femme soft face and everything, and like everyone literally started treating me like a girl the day I moved to this city, like it became impossible for me to boymode suddenly, I coincidentally became friends with a bunch of porn people, and like hot porno girls started messaging me without me messaging them first because they thought I was hot. People don't recognise old photos of myself as me any more.

This isn't really like me asking for more advice with this information I just wanted to like get it out there because it's insane to me and also I want to brag a bit. The first day I came here I didn't change anything about how I dressed and people told me to go to the girls bathroom when I went to the boys.

>>147

In retrospect it makes sense like trans women make fiction and games drawing from their own experiences, but like it feels like I got sucked into someone's horny story or something where I met my first girlfriend who I had a threesome within the first couple days of meeting her and made out with her sloppy style under this nice bridge by the river in New York.

I'm a bit drunk and rambling but this shit is crazy right? Is this just like normal or am I really lucky somehow? Everyone thinks I'm like 10 years younger than I am as well. Like I had a bunch of horrible shit happen as well that feels very unlucky in the opposite direction, but still this transition shit is insane. I played a force femme game the other day and the "insane proportions" my character ended up with had smaller hips than I do irl.

>>146
yea usually its awkward all around the board with these things if im hanging with people who you click with

if you interact with the same people online too at least for me the easiest thing im used to do is like.. i just send kinky memes, art and games and stuff. it helps to gauge interest and find people who think the same stuff is neat

>>147
gz on the sudden hot girl status, definitely makes things easier with getting laid but i can totally understand if things just changed super drastically youre just missing a ton of steps and experience

>>148
your experience does sound pretty extreme but imo its not unheard of. like if i met my pre-trans self id also be losing my shit and cumming on sight at just how i look nowadays?? its been a ton of years but still. getting into romantic/sexual relationships and stuff is waaaaaaaay easier now but at least for me i do have to chalk it up to also me being a battlehardened autistic adult way with more experience by now instead of being a mid dumb autistic teen boy lol